Blog For Free!
Archives
Home
2005 February
2004 July
2004 May
2004 April
2004 March
tBlog
My Profile
Send tMail
My tFriends
My Images
Sponsored
Blog
|
| Time to break up??? |
| 02.17.05 (1:51 pm) [edit] |
Okay...I know I have not written in a long time. I have been so busy! That's another blog in itself.
This time I am writing because I want some feedback. Remember my blog on the "over-competitive friend?" Well it continues, here's another one about the same friend (If you haven't read it, read it!) only this time it's a little different. I am to the point where I am thinking about ending the friendship. It has become ridiculous in so many ways. To get you to fully understand, I will have to fill you in a bit more. Let me backtrack....
When we first became friends, things were fine. She loved hanging out with me and I with her. She wanted to hang out all the time, but wasn't annoying about it or anything. We did everything together and I quickly became her "best friend."
Well as we got closer, I got more clued in by her to all the drama in her life. Long story short, she has a terrible relationship with her father, was sleeping with tons of guys and in a one & a half year period that I knew her at the time, had gotten pregnant 4 times, had 3 abortions - that I KNEW OF & went with her to get or offered money to help because Random Joe wouldn't pay for it, and 1 supposed miscarriage. She was also sleeping with a co-worker's husband, sleeping with some married girl, and trying to join some skanky swingers club. I started to back off since all of this came after her and I had a talk that I thought was a break through moment in her life. I told her she needed to go get counseling because this was a deeper rooted issue and she was bawling her eyes out and admitting that she knew she had problems. After all that, she not only goes back to her ways, but gets worse! It was to the point where I would not use the toilet at her house for fear that I would catch something! Between all of this, there were several failed "relationships." She ONLY dates guys that she meets online. She has all these personal ads on all these different websites. And even when she is in a relationship, she is still talking to other guys for the attention I guess, and does not remove any of her ads. She is always looking for something better. She will be in a relationship, but is always hoping that a better looking guy, or richer guy, or a guy with a better car will come along. It's sad.
She was in a relationship with a guy for a couple of weeks, they got engaged, he bought her ring used on e-bay for $300 (when the guy was making $1500 a WEEK! - If you look at it from her materialistic viewpoint, someone making $6,000 a month and spongeing off their girlfriend for a place to live and car to drive, and no bills should be able to afford more than that! LOL) But she told me the ring came from a jeweler and was like $1000.00. I didn't understand her need to lie. Anyway - from the first time I met him, I knew there was something about him I didn't like. Well he was taking HER car and telling her he was going to work and picking up girls he was meeting online on HER computer. I saw him out one night and told her, and she said, "No, he was at work." But I SAW him. She refused to believe it. Well she finally caught him and after much convincing from me, broke it off. When they had planned their wedding, I wasn't asked to be in it. I asked her why after they broke up. I mean I was her "best friend" and she had co-workers she barely knew as her bridesmaids and I wasn't included. She told me he told her that he did not want me in their wedding because he did not like me. (I seemed "snobby." Well sorry I don't love NASCAR and watch "wrasslin'" and I'm not into "racin' 'stangs" and "cock" and "fuck" aren't every other word that come out of my mouth, and that I was smart enough to see that he was not a good person.) So basically, she tossed aside her "best friend" to satisfy the flavor of the DAY. We had a talk about that and I told her that she was being a sucky friend and that you don't do that to people you care about. (DUH!) She promised to never let a guy come between us again. Well it has happened again. (and the above listed is NOT all we have been through!)
She met this guy online and he seems like the nicest guy she has dated. He is like 26, divorced & still "in the process of getting the house and car stuff settled" (thought all that happened BEFORE the divorce papers were signed, but "hey, whatever!"), but he has a mustang and makes good money - that's all that matters, right?! (I can't seem to convince her to try to meet a guy in real life, not online, that doesn't have a wife or girlfriend, or babies, or baby mama drama, etc. I know there are single men with jobs out there! LOL) But after they dated for a few weeks, they are talking marriage and houses and cars, etc. This time, I have been so supportive. I think it's stupid, same as last time, but he is a nice guy and I can tolerate, and actually enjoy, being around him. So I tell her I am happy for her and don't bother telling her to wait because she does not listen and she will say that I'm "being negative." So confusing as this is, the more supportive I am and the more comments I have made about how Russ and I would like to hang out with them, the less she wants to hang out. Put it this way....ever since she started dating him, she has dropped everything. She doesn't call me, she doesn't e-mail me, she never asks me to go anywhere with her, etc. I tried in the beginning to be like "hey, you wanna go shopping this weekend?" Everytime I asked it was always " I'm spending time with Jason," "We're having dinner with Jason's family," "It's Jason's friend's birthday," and so on. She is so happy to have a boyfriend that she is ignoring everyone else in the world and doesn't even care that she is doing it. I have mentioned it to her politely several times and the last time I did was not-so-polite, but not rude. So I'm fed up with it. I'm just going to not call, come by, or anything. We have not really done anything together since November? of 2004. I have not seen her since the first of January. I know that when they break up, she will want to hang out all the time - like she always does. And if they do get married, she will fuck it up. He'll find out that she is still fucking her 17 year old ex-boyfriend. They'll be married 6 months if that and he'll catch her cheating. Whatever. She's never going to be happy the way she lives her life. So I guess I just wanted to bitch and get all that out to someone, but I would also like to make a few points to completely clear it all out! LOL After this, I bet the "ditch her" comments will come rolling in!
She is...........
a slut with no self respect.
materialistic. Her idea of happiness is all about OWNing things. She is all about status and showing what she has. She likes to think that living in Bartlett makes her something. (A. Bartlett is not that nice anymore. B. She lives in the Memphis part - where all the apartments are.) Which brings me to my next point.
likes to put me down for living in Frayser. I may live in Frayser, but it's not because I can't afford to live in Cordova, it's for other reasons. Honey, I may live in Frayser, but you live in Bartlett and I still have more class, more education, have never had one (or multiple!!) abortions, and don't have any rebel flag tattoos on my body!
over-competitive. (see that blog! LOL)
completely self-centered - all about her and what you can do for her. If you are talking about a problem, she will come in and tell you about hers. If you talk about something you bought, it will turn into what SHE bought, etc. (See the materialistic & competitive comments)
a person who will ditch her friends in a heartbeat for a relationship OR will even ditch plans to go have a one night stand.
dishonest. I have seen and heard her lie to everyone in her life - including myself. Huge thngs, little things, it doesn't matter. I have caught her in lies - she always "falls asleep" when you make plans, but her car is not at her house. Isn't that funny? She not only lies, but hides things too.
Okay - this is all I have time for right now. But I think you get the idea. Should I just stop calling (well, I've already done that part) and when she comes back around just treat her the way she has treated me? Should I try one more attempt to talk to her, but just be blunt and say, "I am going to cut ties with you if you don't change!" or what?
I am to the point where I feel that she is such a crappy friend that I don't really need her anymore. Opinions??? Leave me comments! =)
|
|
|
| |
| Over-competitive friends suck! |
| 07.24.04 (3:24 pm) [edit] |
I need some advice and will also be happy to just hear opinions! :lol:
I have a friend that I have been friends with for years now. Ever since I have become friends with her, she is constantly trying to out-do and compete with me. I have always blown it off because I am not a competitive person. I am also not materialistic like she is. So what someone has or does not have is not important to me - it's how you treat me. I am not impressed by how much you own, what you drive, etc.
It started out with small things. I would mention something like, "I think I am going to go get my nails done." Next day she had hers done before I even had a chance to get to the salon. "I think I am going to start tanning so I can just get a base tan for the summer and not be so pasty." Two weeks later she had been going tanning everyday and had probably spent her whole check on the expensive lotions she bought that get you as dark as you can get as fast as possible!
I get a new cell phone, she has to get one like it. I mention buying a new car, the next week she shows up @ my house to surprise me in her new car. I mean it has gotten ridiculous. I just have to say that I would like to go do something or have something, whatever and then she is all about doing it or having it. It's weird because she takes pride in always bragging about all these things she has and likes to talk about how much all of it cost and how many credit cards she has, etc....but that's exactly it! She has either taken out a loan from her bank or financed every item she has. Nothing is really hers, it technically all belongs to the bank! I mentioned buying a used tanning bed from a friend of ours who needed the money and the next week she was trying to get her credit union to give her a loan to buy a new tanning bed to put in her garage. She got turned down and I told her that it's probably because she has financed her laptop (that she got right after I got mine) and is still paying off all these other loans. She has to finance everything, where I do not live above my means and prefer to pay cash for it. If I can't afford it now, I don't need it, ya know?
Basically, she always has to out do me. I'm not even trying to compete! She gets eaten up inside anytime I have something new or nice. I don't even mention it. It just burns her up if I have anything nicer than her or go on a trip or whatever! I just don't get it!
She even takes pride in paying more for things when she knows she can get them for less! Like I bought some $60 tanning lotion on eBay for $10 because I am smart, right?! Well she brags that she paid $60 for hers! I think that's just admitting that you like to waste money! I mean who would not want to buy a $100 item for $10 and be able to spend the rest of that money on something else?!
I just don't get it! I have to go to work now, but will write more later! There is so much more to this story!
|
|
|
| |
| "Excuse me...are you my ex-wife?" |
| 07.01.04 (10:14 pm) [edit] |
Yes, the subject line was a question that I was asked today. Well not directly, but the man actually thought I was his ex wife. I should have said, "Yes, and I came to collect the past ten years worth of alimony that you forgot to pay me." I'm sure you are wondering what the hell this is about, so I will explain. (Not that anyone is going to miss any sleep tonight if I don't, but...just in case! :lol: )
So I am out having coffee with some friends. I walk in and join them. I sit for about 20 minutes before the guy even acknowledges my presence. He comes over and asks what I want to drink. I get coffee. He comes back and puts the cup down and looks at me and says, "well...hello!!!" as if I had just walked in. I said hello politely and went back to my conversation with my friends. He proceeds to STAND THERE! I stop talking and look back up at him in a very "may I help you?" fashion. He says, "how are you doing tonight?" I started laughing and said, "fine, thank you." as if to say, "yeah, hi, okay, leave!" I wasn't trying to be rude, I just wasn't in the mood for scary coffee shop guys to be hitting on me tonight, ya know?! So he leaves. He keeps coming over like every 5 minutes to check on us. Finally my friend is like, "WE'RE GOOD!!! Thank you!!" So as soon as I can sit my cup down, he's like one of the friggin' Nascar pit crew people rushing out to fill it back up. So we're talking and talking and he's sitting there staring at me the whole time. Finally, it comes time for us to leave. My friends and I are standing in the parking lot talking and saying our goodbyes and dude comes OUT of the BUILDING! He walks up and is like "I'm sorry to bother you, but I will never forgive myself if I don't ask this question." I'm like "okaaaayyy....." He says, "Is your name Laurie?" I said "no." He says, "okay, well you look just like someone I knew named Laurie." I said, "well yeah, I get that alot - I always seem to look JUST LIKE someone somebody knows!" (My cousin was even married to a girl that could have been my twin! My own family even got us confused from across a room!) He then says, "Well you are the spitting image of my ex wife. I mean EXACTLY - you could be her twin!" I was like "oh, really?! Heh...." (creeped out) He says, "Yeah, sorry to bother you....I just had to know." With that, he walked away and I turned to my friends who had puzzled looks on their faces and I said, "Do you mean to tell me that you would not know your ex-wife if you saw her?? How long were ya married? A day?!" They were equally creeped out. We said our goodbyes and I noticed that he watched me get into my car and came up to the window and looked out like a puppy as I drove off. I just cannot believe that. I still think I should have asked for the alimony. I prolly (Matt's word) could have even gotten some kid out of the next booth over to pose as "ours" and gotten some child support too. :lol:
|
|
|
| |
| NOT SO HAPPY MEAL |
| 07.01.04 (9:48 pm) [edit] |
|
Ok....so I go to McDonald's the other day to get one of those "Premium Salads" right? I like the grilled chicken caesar - they're pretty good for a salad from a fast food place. Anyway, I decided that today I was going to get the "adult happy meal." You know, it's a salad, bottle of water and a step-o-meter (the toy of the adult happy meal)! So I order and they tell me that they are out of the step-o-meters! I said okay, but was crushed on the inside. I know that I would have thrown it away anyway because it doesn't really work, but it was the principal of the matter. You would not tell a child that you were "out of the toys" that go into THEIR happy meal. You'd come up with some shit to put in there, ya know??!! It's like when a kid comes to your door on Halloween and you just gave out the last of the candy. You start digging for something else, be it cash or a can of green beans! :lol: Anyway, I got back to the office and sat at my desk to eat my lunch which had gone from happy to crappy. Do you know why? Not only did I not get the toy, but it didn't even come in the little box. It came in just a plain ol' bag! Come on! That happy meal just turned into a bunch of lettuce and water for lunch. Now tell me.....what's so friggin' happy about that!? :x
|
|
|
| |
| "My address? 1234 Marqueesha Alize Cove." |
| 05.16.04 (12:19 am) [edit] |
So we just moved into a house. This is the first one for us to share. (And I am not counting the duplex we lived in out in Midtown. It was awesome - a huge 1920's house that was built with one apartment upstairs and one down with seperate entrances with 12 foot ceilings, hardwood floors, french doors, a balcony, huge fireplace with tile and a 5ft high mantle and built in bookcase, old clawfoot bathtub, 3rd story full attic, etc....just character out the wazoo. Can you tell I miss it?) Well our new house is pretty nice. It's a bungalow style and about 50 years old. It's 3 bedroom and 1 bath - which sucks b/c our apartment in Bartlett had 2 bathrooms and I really got used to having my own and being able to leave my millions of bottles of lotions and perfume out! Anyway, I will just have to try to remember how to share! :lol: So back to the house...
It has all new paint and carpet, a new roof & vinyl siding, and a 3 car garage for Russ to work in! Plus with the 3rd bedroom now & the garage, I can finally have my office without having to devote a corner for the rubbermaid container of car parts! :lol: (Our ongoing joke is that I don't have to ask him to move a transmission to take a bath anymore!)
The yard is great too. The back yard is huge and has tons of old trees - we even have a tulip poplar which I love because we had one growing up. The yard is really shady and will be great this summer. Plus, I'm so excited about having a yard to work in - I bought some mixed wildflower seeds tonight and can't wait to plant them!
Anyway, now that you are all filled in about the house, let me explain the subject line of this blog. Around the corner from us is a brand new subdivision that's only like a year old. The houses are beautiful. It has this nice brick entry with the name of the subdivision...SKYLONDA! All the street names are ghetto names! :lol: So everytime we drive past, we always make up names like Marqueesha Alize Cove, Talvorious Circle, etc. Anyway, it makes me chuckle and wonder where in the hell they came up with the names!
Ok, now I have to take a break and then add another blog about other things!
|
|
|
| |
| OBLIVION |
| 05.15.04 (2:02 am) [edit] |
YES. I LIVE IN OBLIVION. AT LEAST WHEN IT COMES TO MEN. ALWAYS HAVE. I DONT KNOW WHY IT IS SO HARD FOR ME TO SEE WHEN SOMEONE IS INTERESTED IN ME. I JUST NEVER NOTICE SOMETIMES. IT ALWAYS COMES DOWN TO MY FRIENDS TELLING ME THAT THE GUY IS DIGGING ON ME, ME ASKING "REALLY? I DONT SEE IT."
WELL FOR THE PAST FEW YEARS I HAVE NOT DEALT WITH THAT MUCH SINCE I AM ENGAGED.
HERE IS MY PROBLEM:
(I HAVE TO BE VERY GENERAL TO NOT GIVE AWAY ANY NAMES OF PEOPLE OR COMPANIES, SO BARE WITH ME! I'M CHANGING NAMES HERE TO PROTECT THE INNOCENT AND THE NOT-SO-INNOCENT)
OK, THERE IS THE GUY WHO IS THE GM OF WELL-KNOWN, SUCCESSFUL COMPANY. I'VE TALKED TO HIM FOR 3 YEARS OVER THE PHONE BECAUSE MY EMPLOYER WORKS CLOSELY WITH HIS COMPANY. HE IS VERY NICE AND ALWAYS MAKES ME LAUGH WHEN WE TALK. (PLUS, IN ALL THE YEARS WE'VE TALKED, I NEVER EVEN KNEW HE RAN THIS COMPANY - HE WAS ALWAYS SO DOWN TO EARTH AND TALKED TO ME LIKE HE WAS JUST SOME AVERAGE JOE AT THE COMPANY! SO I FELT LIKE AN ASS WHEN I ASKED WHAT HE DID THERE! LOL) WE HAD NEVER MET UNTIL THE OTHER DAY. HE ASKED ME TO COME BY HIS OFFICE AND SAID HE HAD SOMETHING FOR ME AND SOMETHING FOR OUR OFFICE. SO I WENT. WHAT I HAD TO PICK UP ONLY TOOK A FEW MINUTES, BUT HE WANTED ME TO WALK AROUND WITH HIM AND TALK, SO I DID. NOTHING SO FAR HAS STRUCK ME AS OUT OF THE NORM. HE'S ASKING ME WHAT TYPE OF THINGS I LIKE TO DO IN MY SPARE TIME, HOW I LIKE MY JOB, BASIC STUFF. THEN AS I AM LEAVING, HE GOES TO SHAKE MY HAND AND WON'T LET GO. HE THEN PROCEEDS TO TELL ME THAT I HAVE BEAUTIFUL EYES AND THAT I SHOULD CALL HIM AND JUST SAY HI SOMETIME INSTEAD OF HIM ALWAYS CALLING ME (FOR BUSINESS REASONS.)
SO THE NEXT DAY HE CALLS JUST TO SAY HI. THEN A FEW HOURS LATER HE CALLS & SAYS "HI, BEAUTIFUL, MAY I SPEAK TO (MY BOSS.)" THEN A FEW HOURS LATER I COME BACK FROM RUNNING ERRANDS AND SEE A PACKAGE ON MY DESK WITH HIS NAME ON IT. HE SHOWS UP 5 MINUTES LATER TO PICK IT UP. (IT WAS SOMETHING FROM MY BOSS.) THEN LIKE AS SOON AS HE GOT BACK TO HIS OFFICE, HE CALLS TO SAY HI AGAIN. WELL THAT NIGHT THERE WAS THIS MIXER PARTY THING AT HIS COMPANY THAT OURS WAS INVITED TO. I DID NOT GO, SO THIS MORNING HE CALLS TO ASK WHERE I WAS. THEN HE ASKS WHAT I AM DOING FOR LUNCH. OKAY - THAT WAS THE POINT WHERE EVEN I, AS BLIND AS I AM TO A GUY BEING INTERESTED IN ME, NOTICED THAT SOMETHING WAS UP!!! I TOLD HIM I WAS WORKING THROUGH. SO I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO NOW. READY FOR AN INTERESTING TWIST?
HE IS MARRIED AND HE KNOWS THAT I AM ENGAGED!!!
SO NOW I AM DEBATING ON HIS MOTIVES FOR THIS WHOLE THING. AT FIRST I WAS NOT WORRIED, BUT NOW IT IS JUST CREEPING ME OUT. I DONT KNOW IF HE THINKS SOMETHING WILL COME OF IT OR WHAT. I DONT KNOW IF HE IS JUST ONE OF THOSE CREEPS THAT CHEATS ON HIS WIFE WITH YOUNGER WOMEN JUST TO SEE IF HE CAN DO IT OR WHAT. I DONT UNDERSTAND WHAT IS GOING ON THERE. ALL I KNOW IS THAT I HAVE TO BE VERY DELICATE WITH THIS BECAUSE OF THE IMPORTANT RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN HIS COMPANY AND OURS. WE WOULD BE SCREWED BIG TIME IF ANY TIES EVER BROKE THERE.
I DID NOT THINK MUCH AT FIRST, BUT NOW I DO. DON'T GET ME WRONG, I DO NOT THINK FOR A SECOND THAT I AM SPECIAL OR ANYTHING. HE MAY BE FLIRTING LIKE THIS WITH A BUNCH OF GIRLS. THAT'S THE FUNNY THING...IF HE IS A CHEATER, HE IS UNBELIEVABLY CHARMING TO BE SO SCUMMY. HE IS HANDSOME, WELL-DRESSED AND GROOMED, WITTY, CHARMING, POLITE, AND NOT TO MENTION RICH AND POWERFUL, AND SPEAKS WITH AN ACCENT. (HE REMINDS ME VERY MUCH OF JULIA ROBERTS' BOYFRIEND IN OCEANS ELEVEN - HOW HE WAS HANDSOME AND PEOPLE KISSED HIS ASS EVERYWHERE HE WENT, ETC.) LOL SO OF COURSE A MAN LIKE THAT WOULD ONLY HIT ON ME WHILE HE WAS MARRIED AND I AM ENGAGED! ANY GIRLS READING THIS, LET ME TELL YOU...ME AND SOME OF MY MARRIED FRIENDS HAVE PROVEN THAT ONCE YOU GET ENGAGED, HOT MEN COME OUT OF THE WOODWORK TO HIT ON YOU. MODEL QUALITY MEN WILL BE AT YOUR FEET BY THE DOZENS AND ALL YOU CAN DO IS SMILE AND SAY "AW, THANKS, BUT IM ENGAGED." I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW MANY YOUNG, HOT LAWYERS, CUTE COLLEGE BOYS, ETC. HIT ON ME WHEN I AM BARTENDING. I DONT KNOW WHAT IT IS! (WE HAVE DIFFERENT THEORIES, BUT THAT'S ANOTHER BLOG.) ANYWAY, THIS HAPPENED TODAY AND I HAD TO TELL SOMEONE. I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO. JUST LET HIM EVENTUALLY GET THE HINT THAT I AM NOT INTERESTED OR WHAT? HE IS A VERY NICE MAN AND I JUST DONT WANT TO MAKE THINGS WEIRD BECAUSE WE DO TALK ALOT, ETC. PLUS, I DON'T NEED SOME CRAZY WIFE EVEN THINKING THERE IS SOMETHING GOING ON WHEN THERE IS NOT! :)
OKAY, WELL THATS ALL FOR NOW, BUT I WILL BE BACK LATER TO WRITE ABOUT MY NEW HOUSE, BABY RACCOONS, GHETTO SUBDIVISIONS, HOUSE ALARMS, ETC. TRUST ME, IT'S ALL GOOD STUFF. YOU ARE GONNA LAUGH!
|
|
|
| |
| Sunday evening thoughts... |
| 04.11.04 (10:29 pm) [edit] |
I have been wanting to write for some time now, but have not had the time. Odd, huh? Anyway...today was Easter. I'm going to get straight to the point on this one. I miss spending Easter with my family, getting the Easter baskets my mom used to make, and doing East egg hunts in the back yard. I went to church this morning and then later on in the afternoon went to a dinner party at some friends' house. We had so much fun. They introduced me to peep jousting. (I work in theatre and you know these artsy types can be pretty kooky! LOL) Anyway, if you've never done it, you take 2 peeps, stick a toothpick in each one and put them in the microwave facing each other. They swell up and whichever one deflates the other one first is the winner! We did a pink chick against a yellow bunny and the chick won. However, the bunny came out looking an awful lot like Pikachu (sp?) - the Pokemon character! LOL In case you were wondering, yes, I am easily amused!
Anyway, it was more than just blowing up sugar coated bunnies made of.......well, more sugar. We had a really nice time talking about all sorts of things and laughing together. It felt good. I haven't been that social in quite a while. I even caught myself telling some hilarious stories and being in the center of the room with all eyes on me. I have not done that in a while, not because I am too shy, just because I have not been around that many people in a party type setting in few months or so. I kind of miss it. My life is becoming so tame and routine....and I hate that. Plus, Russ isn't so much the social butterfly as I. Being around people and laughing and talking is just my thing. He does not like that much attention. And that's ok. That's just one way we are different. But I have found that we are a really good balance in each other. We both give the other one something that they need and I think it's a good thing. Anyway, enough about all that!
I'm glad that I am finally taking some time for myself to just sit and write. I kind of like this much better than writing in a journal. I have always said that I would like to write a book one day about my life and my experiences...not that I think anyone would care to read it, but I think that that is my purpose here. I believe that there is one person out there that I am supposed to help. And hey, if I can help someone else in the process, even better. I just think that some of the things I have gone through in life could help someone somewhere down the line. They have definately helped shape who I am today...and not to sound conceited, but I really like who I am and am thankful even for the bad things because they made me who I am. Or I guess I should say that the way I chose to accept and handle those things made me who I am. You see, I think all this stuff about "well blank happened to so and so as a child and that is the reason they are the way they are now." is a bunch of crap. You CHOOSE what you want to be. You make a conscious decision to act certain ways and make certain choices. Now there is no doubt that certain events do take a certain psychological toll on people and affect their outlook on life, relationships, and so forth. But ultimately, you can overcome anything even if it takes years of work. Yes, what happened to so-and-so is tragic, but what is really heartbreaking is that they are letting it keep them from moving forward and that they are going to let that affect their quality of life. I am trying to be very vague here because there are so many things that could be covered under this: rape, alcoholic parents, molestation, abusive relatives, a bad love affair, etc. You see what I am getting at, right? Those things can take control of you while they are happening, but why let it control the rest of your life? My Daddy always told me that you can't dwell on the past. If you spend all your time looking at yesterday, you miss out on today and tomorrow. That reminds me of another subject I want to dabble in for a few minutes. Learning from your past and using it for your future. Okay, I have to go put my clothes in the dryer and I will return! :)
Okay..next thing is...PEOPLE WHO DO NOT LEARN FROM THEIR MISTAKES AND CONTINUE TO REPEAT THE SAME MISTAKES OVER AND OVER. I have a few friends that do this and it drives me INSANE! Not so much that I worry about their problems, just that they can be so stupid!!! It mostly deals with relationships, but I also have friends that just do not think anything through before they act. If temporary insanity can get murderers off, I think that there should be something called temporary stupidity that should be able to hold up in court. LOL I mean honestly, if I could go into it all without feeling like I was breaching a code of privacy among my friends, I would. I have a couple that are just incredibly unbelievable. I have gotten to the point where I feel as if I have to back away from the situation and say, "You know what? I can't listen to this anymore. You continue to do the same things, they have the same consequences, and you *wonder* why your life is a big ball of poo." As long as people continue to make up names for conditions and disorders, they should just make one for people that are born without common sense, because we have all known a few in our lifetimes! I have even gotten so fed up with one friend's tradgedies that now when I hear the "latest" I just laugh inside. It just boggles my mind how someone can be so stupid. And what is up with people who tolerate crap from others and allow them to hurt them over and over??? Hello???!!! If someone flat out tells you to your face that they are using you and do not care about you, why continue to associate with the person??? I don't care how much you "love" them...there are a million other people in this world that would treat you ten times better and that you could "love." You can "love" anyone. I can love someone after knowing them for 10 minutes. Honestly! But committing myself to them and opening my heart and life to them are another year away! Ya know??? That is a big problem today too. Boundaries. There are so many definitions of "love" and being "in love" that you just about have to explain your whole theory to someone. I don't know, I think too many people - especially young women, toss the word "love" around that it has lost it's meaning (and potentcy) to alot of people. I once dated a guy for about 3 years off and on and we never once said "I love you" to each other. I knew that I was too young to fully comprehend what that was, but I also knew that I did not love him in the way that I would someone later on in my life that I would commit to. Yes, we were exclusive and we cared very much about each other and we did love each other in many ways - but not in the way that falls into all the complication of defining a relationship. What we had was unspoken and it was just okay.
My friend and I were talking about relationships with our bartender the other night when we had a few drinks. Too many girls now-a-days are focused on marriage and "getting a ring." Some girls stay with a guy for a year and wonder why they have not gotten a ring yet and start putting pressure on a guy. I don't get that. At all. Why the hurry? And why all the big fuss about the actual ring? American culture is the only one who puts all the emphasis on the ring. And you will find that other cultures now only do that because of us Americans. That three month's salary thing is a crock! It was conjured up by the folks at DeBeers years ago. If you don't believe me, research it for yourself! It's quite amusing. Yes, an engagement ring is a long time tradition, but in many cultures, no stone - especially diamond, was used. I just cannot see the sense in spending enough money on a piece of jewely to buy a car with! I could tell you stories I have heard about girls that pitched an absolute fit about it being princess cut, 3 carats, bigger than your last girlfriend's, etc. That's another story for another day.
Anyway, it's my bedtime. Tomorrow is Old Blue Monday, and I have to get some rest. One more thing before I go. I didn't think much about this at first, but there are people out there all over that are reading my life and my thoughts and it's...well, a little weird. And creepy in a way. But okay I guess. I am just interested to know what people think....
|
|
|
| |
| Blame it on Matt |
| 03.30.04 (10:19 pm) [edit] |
Okay, here I am about to start this blog. I didn't even know what one was until Matt introduced me to it. Hence the title! I don't really know where to begin, so I will just jump right in.
Life is pretty much sucking for me right now. I have a lot of things going on, but I am trying to stay positive. Sometimes that's hard - especially when you factor in stress. I am generally a peaceful person, but lately I have had thoughts of choking people. That's not a good thing. Especially when it's just people that happen to be walking by! :lol:
Anyway, I don't really even know who would be reading this, so I will not bore anyone who chooses to read this with all of the details of my current sitch-e-a-shun!
But I will say that I am not getting much sleep and craving margaritas constantly. Is that normal? LOL
I think that maybe this will help me a little...to at least get some things off my chest. I know I have lots of people I could talk to, but I don't want to seem like a drama queen!
I just wish that I could go back to being a kid sometimes. Just for like a day or two. But then again, there were lots of things about childhood that suck just as much as being an adult. Like for one thing...I surely do not miss the smell of that sawdust stuff they used to throw over vomit in elementary school! LOL It was worse than the vomit!
Geez....my cats are tearing things up right now. I have realized lately that having pets is practice for having children. Granted, you would not pour food in a bowl on the floor, leave and say "ok, see ya after 5...don't tear anything up." to a two year old....but it has it's similarities. Just the other day I caught myself yelling across the house, "whatever you are getting into in there must be worth getting your ass beaten!" Then I caught myself and thought about what I had just said. Did I just say that? Anyway, I am sure that I will have more patience with children. And I am also sure that they will not wake me up in the middle of the night by chasing each other across my face. Yes, that really happens. They get into a lot of things in the house and mostly at night. Go figure.
So...I guess I didn't do too bad with my first entry. Seems like it's okay to write about nothing imparticular. If this first one was a little boring to you...gimme a week or so. I'll either have you laughing or crying. Maybe both!
:D
|
|
|
| |
|
|
